San Jose from Fairmont Hotel

There’s really no contest. After two days in San Jose I thought about running down the streets and yelling “Where is everybody…body…body…?”

For being the 10th largest city in the US, according to the Fairmont Hotel laminated guest book, the city is dead. Hence the echo.

Still, had a great time due to the insane amount of people-watching available at American Society of Public Administrators conference. (Mr. Gnome was a presenter.)

What’s better than watching public administrators flirt, dance, and socialize? Watching inebriated public administrators flirt, dance, and socialize.

Public administrator academics grooving. The guy on the right is my fave.

After tagging along at the conference in San Jose, California, I convinced Mr. Gnome to sneak up to San Fran with me. What an amazing day and a half.

36 hours in San Fran: (Pics taken with point-and-shoot Kodak C763)

Fellow Travel Blogger Meet-up: High gravs with the lovely Ekua at Pi in the Mission. She’s intelligent, beautiful, and a super fun person to talk travel with.

Dottie’s True Blue Cafe: Hour wait for perfect 1930s hangover remedy.

Chinatown: Dried fish, lipstick, gilded plastic, gentrified lady gamers.

House of Nanking: Changed my mind about Chinese food. Best. Tofu. Ever.

Beat beat: Spent two hours and $68 at City Lights, people watched at Vesuvio, felt like Bobby D, caught the band Nick Jade and bought their LP on Kerouac alley.

Millennium Restaurant- Lightly roasted fava beans, stuffed artichoke. One of the best meals of my life (just happened to be vegan).

Next time, I want to ride on a trolley car, take a trip to Napa, and basically spend about 4 weeks exploring this crazy cool city. Any advice for next time? Any love for San Jose?

Riding in Patagonia. Photo by: James Harder

I keep asking myself that question.

I’ve even taken a short unintentional hiatus from a lot of writing because I keep asking myself this question, over and over, challenging myself to not only answer the question but take some proactive steps.

Accept…I haven’t come up with an answer.

I’ve read excellent writing books, taken the awesome Matador U course (I now intern for Matador Network), and spent years trying to improve my writing.

I’m beginning to understand, both empirically and intuitively, what constitutes good writing. (The definition of good writing could be, though, another conversation entirely.)

The most important skill that I’ve realized writers need is honesty. Truthfulness.

Clever phrases and word use, excellent research, original thinking, emotional connection, and an ability to make sense of a person, place, or thing on a higher plane are all desired qualities. But it’s really the honesty that matters, bare of the timid, fake, and guarded.

Still…doing that, being that, is hard. Really hard.

Baring myself completely has always made me feel sort of uneasy. Maybe it’s upbringing (a family of secrets); maybe it’s cultural (Southern); maybe it’s age (25), gender (female), or just me (Nancy). It’s as if I can almost get there, but the force of it repels like the negative sides of magnets.

As a pianist, as I feel as though my first language was music. I can actually feel the slightest of emotional nuance at the keyboard without even being able to name it aloud. But that’s the key; that’s the magic of writing– naming it aloud, sharing a specific, collective experience.

I’ve been on two intense journeys at the same time, one spiritual and the other writing. And they’re both linked.

I write as I journal through books by Martha Beck, Byron Katie, Louise Hay, Julie Cameron. I pen the realization that after thinking all these years I was in a prison I was only holding up the bars in front of my face in an open field.

And, as I pursue writing, it provokes me to dig deeper than I thought I would, be more honest than I ever thought was safe.

But what comes first? Can it be a joint organic evolution?

So this is a call to you. How do you find the cajones and patience to be emotionally honest in your writing? And do you have to absolutely know yourself before you can find your voice?

My husband and I are renovating our whole new house and buying furniture on a shoestring dental-floss budget. I’m going for mid-century elegant with a touch of global zen.

So far we have a couch.

couch-photo by the Dude

Not just any couch, but a Kroehler “Avant” series mid-century piece with beautiful lines, original blue fabric, bought for the price of a Tar-jay bookshelf.

The moment I saw the couch’s picture on craigslist I was smitten. One e-mail and two phone calls later, my husband and I were walking up the abstract gravel, sand path to a flat-roofed modern house near Hugh McRae park. The doorbell broken, I knocked timidly on the door.

And then it happened. The “Dude” appeared. THE dude, from the Big Lebowski.

At least his younger version. This guy wasn’t so much a doppelgänger, but a kindred spirit. I could almost hear Bob Dylan singing “The Man in Me”.

Hair mussed, dressed in a white wife beater and jeans, the Dude greeted us with “He-heey. Come on in…” before taking a sip of his White Russian. I shit you not.

And just like the Dude, this guy was down on his luck, selling off furniture, and hanging out in his house between catching waves. (Wilmington sub-in for the bowling alley?)

(photo from Polygram Filmed Entertainment movie poster)

The house was an homage to mid-century modern. I spotted Saarinen chairs in the foyer, a Herman Miller knock-off recliner, and other pieces I wouldn’t deem to know anything about.

He led us to the couch, explaining his girlfriend was making him sell it for cash since he had collected too much furniture already. Someone else had inquired about it via craigslist, but he didn’t deem them good enough owners.

He seemed to love my mid-century enthusiasm and my husband’s own interpretation of devil-may-care attitude (i.e. bed hair, grizzly beard, CNN t-shirt, and basketball shorts).

It was a karmic match. We were deemed cool enough to take the couch and we were stoked to get it. He did us a solid and knocked twenty bucks off without us even asking. We even refused another ten off since the Dude seemed so sad to part with his couch.

As we left in our Home Depot rented-by-the-hour truck, the Dude asked if we would mind sending pictures of the house in its new home in Virginia. We promised. When we got home I found he had sent me an e-mail with the research he had done on the couch and his seal of approval of us as a ‘cool couple, man’.

Somewhere out there the Dude is out a couch but at least it was on the Dude’s terms and not peed on it. Maybe he can swindle one out of the real Lebowski.

Zoey-by author

Our pit bull, Zoey, is adorable. She’s also eerily smart.

(Shameless plug alert: For more information about her and pit bull bigotry, check out my recent article on matadorchange.com.)

My husband and I drove to Greensboro, NC last spring so I could give my final graduate recital at UNCG.

We checked in at the dog-friendly La Quinta and took her for a walk around the hotel grounds.

We decided to go out for a nice dinner to relax before the next day’s stress, leaving Zoey with toys, food, and water.

Mid-way into my second beer and hummus plate, I get a call from a Greensboro number.

“Hello, Mrs. Harder?”

“Er…yes.”

“Do you have a brown dog with teal collar?”

“UMM-yes”

“You dog is sitting with us at the front desk. She was running around the lobby greeting incoming guests.”

“Oh my god. I’m so so so sorry!!!”

“It’s ok. She’s sweet. We just wanted to make sure it was your dog before we put her back in the room. We figured she was yours since your door was open.”

James and I hurry through our meal, feeling incredibly guilty for leaving our hotel room door somehow ajar. On the way back to the hotel we get another call:

“Hello, Mrs. Harder?”

“Yes…”

“Your dog is sitting at the front desk again.”

WTF?

The hotel staff agree to keep her behind the desk. We walk into the lobby and Zoey greets us like she does at home, tale wagging and licking profusely.

Thankfully, the hotel staff is very friendly about the whole thing and keep assuaging our profuse apologies.

The verdict?

Our dog knows how to open doors.

We even tested her by leaving her in the room and standing outside the door. Sure enough, Zoey started jumping on the horizontal lever, building momentum until she could get a paw in the door to prop it open.

That’s our baby…She’ll be hard-pressed to top that pet travel memory for us. Seeing her sprint towards us in the hotel lobby, pleased grin on her face: priceless.

Now it’s your turn. What’s your favorite pet travel memory?

Books-Austinevan

There’s something romantic, alive about used books.

Every book feels like a possible treasure, an interesting shell on the beach, made more beautiful by time and experience. Perhaps less clean and perfect than store-bought shells, but more delicious in its journey.

I love the musty, beige pages, smelling only like old books do.

I find myself wondering where these books have traveled, who read them, when and why they bought and read them, why they sold them.

Each book is its own travel experience. It’s incredibly exciting to find something the reader, traveler has left behind-an old receipt, bookmark, even underlined words.

I had one of those weeks where book treasures were abundant. At a used bookstore three blocks from our place, I found a collection of poetry by Marge Piercy in addition to a rad thesaurus type book called “Word Menu” and Herman Hesse’s “Siddhartha”.

I had never heard of Marge Piercy, but the book, “The Moon is Always Female” was sort of displayed and looked well-loved. Plus, the title intrigued me. I opened to the first poem “Inside Chance” and lines like this hooked me:

Inside the fallen brown

apple the seed is alive.

Freeze and thaw, freeze

and thaw, the sap leaps

an the maple under the bark

and although they have

pronounced us dead, we

rise again invisibly,

we rise and the sun sings

in us sweet and smoke

as the blood of the maple

that will open its leaves

like thousands of waving hands

The poems are sensual, earthy, and interesting. And I probably wouldn’t have stumbled across it in a big box book store, especially not for 6 dollars.

I’ve since researched Marge Piercy, discovering her website and body of work. Amazing stuff. The Boston Globe writes “Marge Piercy is not just an author, she’s a cultural touchstone. Few writers in modern memory have sustained her passion, and skill, for creating stories of consequence.”

I love that books begin a continuum of learning.

My husband and I checked out a consignment store over the weekend looking for cute, cheap mid-century furniture. Didn’t buy any, but I stumbled upon Allen Ginsberg’s “Howl” and Jack Kerouac’s “The Dharma Bums” for two books each and a Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche’s “The Myth of Freedom and the Way of Meditation” for free. Free!

Free books are better than money. Imagine a world where books were currency…utopian for sure, but pretty damn sweet.

———

How about you? What are your thoughts on used books? Are used bookstores on their way out? Do you enjoy new or old books better? Have any favorite bookstores around the globe?

Photo: Nicholas Kennedy

Inspired by David Miller’s post asking reader’s what music they listen to when they write, I got to thinking about my own perfect writing conditions.

I’m still finding the best way to inspire flow, but these conditions are usually best:

1. I sit on the couch, dog usually managing to condense her 45 lb form onto my lap.

2. I play some slow acoustic-y beats, preferably on vinyl. Bon Iver, José González, Elvis Perkins, Segovia, Simon & Garfunkel, Phillip Glass, George Winston, John Adams. If I’m feeling crazy, I’ll thrown on some more electronic-based music like Pretty Lights, Whitest Boy Alive, Of Montreal, Radiohead.

3. A soy chai is preferably in front of me and I’m clear about what I want to write.

4. My pc is not being feisty and pretending not to work.

5. E-mails and social media sites have already been checked and updated.

5. It’s in the afternoon. Afternoons tend to be the most productive when my brain has dethawed with a combination of meditation, yoga, piano practice, and reading. Since I teach one-on-one piano and voice lessons a couple afternoons a week, it’s a natural progression to stay in focus on the rest of the week’s afternoons.

Being mindful of my ideal writing process doesn’t change my life. But over time, drop by drop, the awareness and attention add up, making my life happier and natural feeling. I can already feel it, since I started trying to observe my natural tendencies.

What are your best conditions? Any conditions that make the writing process more natural?

Home sweet home. Not. Photo gilched from That Canadian Grrl

Mr. Gnome and I just purchased our first home.

It’s beautiful, just what we wanted: a great deal on a well-built house in a nice neighborhood. (Bonus: A gorgeous view of the Blue Ridge mountains.)

Somehow, though, as I sat in the title company’s conference room closing on the house, dog leash in one hand, pen-on-deed in another, I felt like I was cheating on my wanderlust.

Despite the fact that we’ll save money month-to-month (even excluding the 8k, first-time homebuyer kickback and projected return on investment), it made my inner backpacker widen her eyes in alarm and lament scream, “Now you’ll never travel again!”

Of course, this is ridiculous.

Even worse than ridiculous, it’s just my fear-hungry inner lizard that worries about basic needs and comforts.

But still, why does being a travel junkie and a home-owner have to feel mutually exclusive? It’s similar to the conversation about what it means to be a traveler.  Some people quit their jobs to travel, some work/study abroad, some work at home and travel when they can.

In my opinion, it’s all good.

I sometimes have the image in my head of being some wanderer-hippie chick super long hair, a penchant for cheap hostels, and a desire to live as meagerly as possible with all of my possessions squished in a backpack.

But, I know my most authentic self is a little different.

I’m the gal who loves lazily wandering around the world, sharing beers with new friends and old, catching good tunes, playing piano for hours at a time, writing about the world and change, volunteering…and is secretly thrilled to pick out paint colors and hunt for cheap mid-century furniture.

Shhhh.

I have no intention to stop traveling. In fact, I know I won’t stop traveling.

As cliche as it may be, I’ve just learned over the years it’s about what makes you happy. Or “whatever works” as Larry David’s misanthropic character grunts in Woody Allen’s latest film.

I may not be the *cool* traveler, but here I am: a travel-obsessed chick composing songs for the pitbull sitting next to her Eames-era coffee table.

What do you think?

Have any of you felt the adventurer/abode dilemma?

Painted Lady in La Boca-Alaskan Dude

Most of the talked-up attractions of Buenos Aires are true. The soccer, tango, meat: all there in large proportions. Although I could list many things about Buenos Aires that are surprising and cool, the following are 8 random things to keep in mind if you’re hitting BsAs up:

1. Don’t throw your toilet paper down the toilet. Geez! I threw the toilet paper down the toilet paper every single damn time. I read the signs, made mental notes, promised myself not to screw up Argentina’s plumbing system. Unfortunately, rote habit kept me from heeding the “PLEASE DON’T PUT TOILET PAPER IN TOILET” signs. Sorry Argentina.

2. Locate a couple of ATMS around your hostel/hotel. ATMs in BsAs will frequently run out of cash, possibly leaving you panicked when the hostel bill is due.

3. Save your coins and small bills. Speaking of money, you should, “horde your change as if it were porn in the 1980s and lie to store clerks about having it as if they were your mom,” as Kate Sedgwick writes in her How to Take the Bus in Buenos Aires Like You Know What’s Going On piece.  Buses only accept coins and you’ll get dirty looks throwing down a 100 peso spot for small purchases.

4. Watch your step. Sidewalks are uneven (I assume they’re privately owned?) and decorated with dog poop.

5. Don’t pull a map out on the street. This goes for most major cities around the world. One of our friends got robbed in broad daylight in the city center doing this. Use common sense and look at your map/guidebook in a store or secure area.

6. You don’t have to eat meat all the time. There are parrillas all over the place, but there are some fantastic ethnic and vegetarian restaurants in the city.

7.  Don’t even think about eating before 9pm. 11-3am is the most hopping at the popular restaurants.

8. Call cabs. Don’t hail them off the street. Call Radio Taxi,  Radio Taxi Premium if it’s available.

Keep these tips in mind as you visit and drink some of that luscious Malbec while you’re there.

The Basic Book of Digital Photography-Tom and Michele Grimm

I recently had the opportunity to interview Tom and Michele Grimm, who just released their book, “The Basic Book of Digital Photography: How to Shoot, Enhance, and Share Your Digital Pictures”. Their classic book, “The Basic Book of Photography” has sold 400,000 copies since its released in 1974.

Now, this husband and wife team have written a comprehensive digital photography follow-up. The book appeals to both point-and-shoot and (D)SLR camera users. It’s accessible enough for true beginners, but advanced enough to benefit more experienced photographers.

Read up on why you should never get too close to a pig-greased Papua New Guinean.

#1: Describe the process of writing this 528 page book. How long did it take?

The key to writing a reference book like ours is to begin with a very detailed outline.  We began by listing 18 chapters, and then the 127 main topics within those chapters.  During the two years we spent writing the book, we occasionally changed the order of the chapters and moved some topics to different chapters.  Cross referencing (i.e, “see page …”) was important because some subjects overlap from chapter to chapter and we wanted to avoid repeating ourselves.   For the most enjoyable reading, we kept the text informal and broke up most pages of copy with illustrative photos (there are 400 in the book) and text boxes with important tips or personal remarks.

#2: What was the impetus for writing a resource about digital photography?

Quite frankly, our publisher (Plume/Penguin) decided it was time for an all-digital book.  “The Basic Book of Photography” was first published in 1974 and we updated and expanded it on a regular basis, including adding a chapter about digital photography in 1993.  But we also wanted to do a totally new book,  because digital photography was rapidly becoming more popular than film photography.  Thus “The Basic Book of Digital Photography” was born and first appeared in bookstores and online sales outlets like Amazon.com three months ago.

#3: What target audience did you have in mind when you wrote it?

Based on our earlier success with “The Basic Book of Photography,” which has sold more than 400,000 copies, we also aimed our digital photography book to a wide range of photographers from novices to pros.  It is far more than just a discussion of digital cameras and how to use them.  For instance, we describe how to edit and improve your digital photos with computer software, and how to print them at home or use a local or online photo printing service.  Very worthwhile is the chapter about composition that has our tips for how to become a better photographer.  At the end of the book is an extensive glossary that explains every term you’ll encounter in digital photography.

World-traveling photographers and authors Michele & Tom Grimm visit with the King Penguins on South Georgia Island during an Antarctic expedition.

#4: What is it like co-authoring, shooting, and traveling as a married couple?

Pure hell! – just kidding.  It’s really been a helluva good time for the past 39 years.

#5: Do you each have different favorite types of subjects to shoot (landscape, people, etc…)?

We both like to photograph people and wildlife, but it takes planning and patience to capture their best expressions.  Tom also enjoys landscape and architectural photography, which requires a sturdy tripod for precise composition and a time when the light is just right (because you can’t move the scenery or buildings around).

#6: You’ve traveled to every continent and 130 countries. Where have been your favorite places to shoot?

We call our favorites the AAAs: Antarctica, Africa, Alaska.   The reason is an abundance of wildlife.  Animals, birds, reptiles and insects are real challenges to photograph but the reward is when you capture a great image.

#7: Where did your love of photography come from? Who has influenced your art?

Tom started shooting with a borrowed film camera in elementary school, and got into the darkroom during high school and college while working on the schools’ newspapers and yearbooks and in a local portrait studio.  Michele learned from Tom, who was teaching photography at the University of California at Irvine when we got married.  She attended under an assumed name for fear of being called the teacher’s pet.

#8: Do you have an interesting/favorite story from your photojournalism adventures?

Michele & Tom Grimm take a break from photographing the colorfully-painted faces of Huli Wigmen at Tari in the Southern Highlands of Papua New Guinea.

Do you want to hear about the bloody sheep’s head that was thrown at Tom while he was photographing people in a market in Djibouti, Africa?  Or when a gray whale surfaced next to our rubber raft in Baja, Mexico, and spouted ocean water from its blowhole while we were changing lenses on our SLR cameras?  Or the time a naked native who had covered his body with pig grease to stay warm in the Highlands of Papua New Guinea gave Michele a big hug while she was taking his picture?

#9: What is your photography philosophy?

Let your eyes be a camera lens so you can envision pictures wherever you go.   Look all around you, not just at obvious subjects.  Then shoot, shoot, shoot – everything.

#10: Do you have any advice for aspiring photographers?

Day or night, always carry your camera with you – a great picture could be just around the corner.  Use your imagination and keep shooting – it really doesn’t cost anything extra to take as many digital pictures as you wish.

*Author Disclaimer: I received a free copy of the Basic Book of Digital Photography to review the book and interview the Grimms.*

If you enjoyed this article, be sure to check out these related posts:

My interview with Face of America photographer, Mark McCambridge and recent Photo Essay from Portland, Oregon.

I will soon get used to writing the numbers 1-0. Currently, I ‘m catching myself at 2-0-0, right before writing the “9″. I’m getting adept at squeezing a “1″ before a third “O”. Anyone else still adjusting?

We return from our 5 week Argentina trip on Monday, January 11. We’ve hung with the city folk in BsAs, drank copious amounts of Malbec in Mendoza, trekked on glaciers and mountains in Patagonia, and chilled with penguins and sea lions in Ushuaia.

Get ready for Argentina-related stories and pics out the wazoo, now that I’m re-emerging into wifi-friendly spots.

As a taste of what’s to come, here’s a video by Mr. Gnome.

(Forgive the shakiness-Mr. Gnome doesn’t suffer from arthritis, our point-and-shoot sneaks whiskey when we’re not looking.)

Horse-back riding near El Calafate, one of my favorite experiences of the trip:

(For the record-I said my horse’s name was Carasusia. Darn wind from those stunning Patagonia mountains…) We ended up loving horseback riding so much we went back two more times.